I think the picture above captures everyone’s feelings when Friday finally rolls around.
It’s been a long week. School is back in session this week. I was having some technical difficulties with the blog. But luckily my tech savvy bestie saved the day. 🙂 [thanks Nita!] I’ve been staying up way too late watching the Olympics. We’ve had rain every single day this week. Needless to say the family, including the pups, are going stir crazy! Poor Olive’s look of longing to go play outside.
So yes, basically, life happened this week. 😛
Onto the Yays and Oh Nos for the week shall we. 🙂 Continue reading
Hello friends 🙂
Seems like I blinked and the summer is almost over. Since our last chat, I celebrated a birthday. Every new year and my birthday are the two times throughout the year that I reflect on my life. But I’m not going to lie…I wasn’t really happy with how last year went. I had made some serious progress/strides in the year before and I had really big ambitions to keep on moving forward. However, I just could never get the momentum to keep going. It really felt like my enthusiasm, drive, passion, etc just were nowhere to be found.
After a couple of health set backs in the past year (nothing serious – thank God), plus the difficulties that life will throw our way, I believe I fell into a sort of depression. Not the clinical kind or anything like that…but for me…when I can’t make progress or feel like I’m being productive it can weigh heavily on me. Lots of heart felt and tear filled conversations with my husband on how I feel like I’m sucking at this whole family thing, career, blogging, etc. I often feel like I’m just messing up royally. It’s so difficult trying to do the right thing. Often times you just want to give up. I think kids, particularly teens, think that parents often do things out of anger and a desire for control. Little do they know how much fear surrounds parents. The fear of the unknown, fear of someone hurting them, fear of a choice that has lasting impacts, fear that they truly mean it when they say they hate and/or will never forgive you when you have to make those tough parenting decisions. I’ve cried more this year than I ever did in all of my teen years. Guys – this parenting thing is tough! Being a good partner when life gets tough is hard. Trying to be a positive contributor to the world around you is practically impossible when you feel like you are just a shell of the person you once were… Where did that girl go? And how do I reconnect with her..?
And this is where I need to pick up from. The woman that I am today. Life has changed me but at the core…the original me is still there. So I will not count my year of 33 as a failure (big step for me!). I’ll call it a time out. I was just getting my bearings with this new phase of life. After all – it’s only when I quit trying that I truly fail….don’t you agree?
Happy Monday friends!
I hope you all had a fantastic Father’s Day. Sunday, June 19 marked two years since my Dad passed away. I miss him but am happy to report I’m doing well. I know my Dad wouldn’t want me to be sad. Last night was also a full moon. Fun story: every full moon my Dad would call me (while I was away at college) and howl on the phone. My roommates can attest to hearing this a time or two. So it was nice to see a beautiful full moon on the second anniversary of his passing which also happened to be Father’s Day. I am so thankful for these signs that God allows my Dad to send me. 🙂
Guys…the hubs and I finally broke down and bought new couches. We’ve had our current set up for almost 10 years. *gasp* Needless to say, the cushions are telling us they are d-o-n-e. Other than that, they are in really great shape. We had originally agreed to wait to buy new couches till our next house. However because our couches are a bit on the wore out side – we hadn’t really had get togethers like we use to with our friends and family. I mean, we don’t want our guests struggling to get off the couch. Know what I mean? Any way – the couch will be here Thursday and our loveseat will arrive in a few weeks. The huge expense of new furniture has a tendency to leave me with a little buyer’s remorse. However, when I got back home after the purchase and saw my old well used furniture…yeah…it’s definitely time. I can’t wait for the new couch. I will be sure to post a picture with the new couch. 🙂
On Saturday morning, we sent off sweet Emily (our temporary foster) and another foster named Toto. I drove out to the Cabot Animal Shelter to pick up Toto who was an absolute sweetheart. I left Emily at home because I wanted her to have as much playtime with Olive in the backyard. The picture above was from the afternoon before she left. The hubs rode with me to take Emily and Toto to the Conway Municipal Airport for their flight to Minnesota. I’m sure the puppies will definitely appreciate the cooler temperatures than hot box Arkansas. I was suppose to take pictures for the animal rescue that coordinated everything. But the hand-off happened so quickly – probably for the best. We waited to watch them take off. I shed a few tears. However I know they are getting another chance for a new family that will hopefully love them as much as I do. Sweet Emily – I hope you enjoyed your time with our family and know we enjoyed you so much. Your sweet temperament and playful spirit were such a joy. Olive misses you and will occasionally look for you still. Thanks for being such a great playmate for our “strong-willed” Doxie.
I told the hubs I would totally support him getting his pilot’s license if he would provide transport. I believe the organization this pilot worked with is Pilots N Paws Pet Rescue. It was such a cool experience. A little sad but for selfish reasons I admit. But if you have the ability, please consider fostering an animal. 🙂
Question of the Day: Have you ever or would you ever consider fostering an animal?
Happy Tuesday everyone,
The summer heat is definitely starting to make its presence known in the Natural State. Not only does it get crazy hot – but insanely HUMID. Double whammy. I’ll take dry heat any day.
A couple of weekends ago I took the kiddo and a couple of her friends to Riverfest. Riverfest is an annual summer music festival in Little Rock along the Arkansas River that typically lands around the Memorial Weekend. However this year, it was the weekend after Memorial Day. We saw X Ambassadors, Kelsea Ballerini, Barrett Baber, and Goo Goo Dolls. I was hoping to catch Grace Potter but she was on a different stage during Kelsea Ballerini’s performance (which the kiddo and her friends wanted to see). Goo Goo Dolls were of course awesome! My all time favorite song “Iris” was the highlight of my night.
I don’t know how many times I attempted to write about this event. The details are still very clear in my memory. The emotions are still very raw. After this event happened – all I wanted to do was forget about it. Move on with my life and never ever have to deal with those memories and feelings ever again. But someone asked me a simple question…not knowing what all really happened or the complexities of it all. Instantly I felt shame. My first instinct was to ignore the question and flee. But then it hit me, if I don’t provide him with the facts – it perpetuates the false idea everyone was thinking. So I told him, not all of the details, but enough that it changed his opinion about what he thought he knew.
See most of us don’t know the whole truths about a lot of stories. For me, it seemed the “right” thing to do was to look the other way when you heard or suspected something wasn’t quite right. I’m just a kid and no one is going to believe a kid/teenager over an adult. Or someone else, who has the authority, will take care of the situation. But as I got older, I became less and less OK with not speaking up. Continue reading
Happy Memorial Day!
I hope everyone is having a great Memorial Day weekend. For being two days long, weekends sure seem to fly by a heck of a lot faster than the work days during the week. Some highlights from our weekend:
We bought a couple of trees from Bemis Tree Farm. The two Cypress trees we transplanted from the front of our house to the back aren’t doing so hot. We learned that trees with fibrous roots often do not transplant well. Good to know because I was feeling transplant guilt. Because we are wanting some privacy from certain neighbors, we decided we needed some bigger plants than the sapling sizes available at places like Lowes and Home Depot. FYI – the bigger/more mature the tree the more $$$. The nice thing about Bemis Tree Farm is that they deliver and plant the trees for you. Since I cannot dig a hole to save my life, my husband is truly appreciating this included service. 🙂 I’ll be sure to post some pictures after they are delivered and planted.
We went hunting at Restoration Hardware Outlet for a dining table. Mainly we went because on holidays they offer additional discounts. Unfortunately the in store stock had more than minor damage and would require extensive repairs. If you tell them the style, size, and color of the pieces you are searching for, they will call you if any come in. Fingers crossed the one I’m wanting will show up during the 4th of July weekend sale.
I’m trying gluten free. No I do not have Celiac. No I do not think I have an allergy to gluten. However, I have been dealing with inflammation. It was suggested by my acupuncturist to try going gluten free. I’ve been gluten free for almost two weeks. Any big revelations? Convenience foods are not made for gluten free diets. I’m craving sugar like no tomorrow. There are a lot more options for a gluten free diet than back in the day. Unfortunately, to see a change, I’m probably going to have to do this for a few months. I think I will give it a month. I was able to give up sweet tea for a month. I actually did notice improvements there. But I also compensated for my lack of sweet tea intake by eating more dessert. Ooops.
I’ve made my own salad dressing a few times. And frankly, I think they taste way better than the store bought stuff! I don’t measure and just kind of go off of taste. I’ve used olive oil, lemon juice, honey, and Dijon mustard as my base and adjust the seasonings from there.
Have a great week everyone and chat with you soon.
Happy Wednesday everyone,
I’ve been on a really big brunch kick lately. Thankfully, my husband has kindly obliged my brunch binge. Here are my favorite brunch spots in Little Rock:
@ the Corner: A modern diner
I really like this place. They kept popping up in my twitter feed for Little Rock food places. The hubs and I finally committed to making the trek to downtown. I’ve had the biscuits and gravy. Their gravy is sooo good. Like their gravy actually is savory and full of flavor. The hubs had some sort of hash (can’t remember the name of it) and he too loved it. The kiddo has had their chicken tenders and said they are some of the best she’s ever had. FYI – teenagers are chicken finger connoisseurs so her opinion has some pretty decent weight on this issue. 🙂 The decor is perfectly described as a “modern diner”. The space is clean and the service is great. Everyone is very friendly and the food comes out relatively quickly. They even offer flavored water. Talk about classy. 😛
The Root Cafe
A quaint and eclectic space that offers delicious food supporting local farms. The food is fantastic here. They often offer vegetarian and vegan specials. My personal brunch favorites are the root benny, eggs bahn mi, and mocha. Their mochas are so good. The space is small and gets busy fairly early on the weekends. So don’t be surprised to see lines around 9 AM on a Saturday or Sunday.
This place is a nice compromise for brunch for the hubs and I. They offer an extensive lunch menu. So while I’m getting my breakfast fix, the hubs is able to order a sandwich. The service is friendly but not always the quickest. But their pancakes make the wait worth your while. I don’t even like pancakes – but I devour their pancakes! They offer lots of add-ins for your pancakes. My personal favorite is banana, blueberries, and walnuts. So delicious. The kiddo gets strawberries and chocolate chips in her pancakes.
Some honorable mentions:
Question of the day: Any other brunch lovers? What are you favorite places to grab a good breakfast?
OK – it’s been at least 3 years since I’ve been to a yoga class. I really like yoga. I mean what’s not to like about savasana?? I haven’t tried hot yoga or anything much more difficult than the beginner classes, but I always appreciate the mindfulness and clarity I feel during yoga. Helps take the edge off of a mind that is always thinking about a million things. Know what I mean? I’ve decided to bring yoga back into my life. I went to the beginner class at Barefoot Studio in Little Rock. One interesting thing I noticed during the class, I was a lot stronger than the last time I had done yoga. I didn’t struggle with any of the poses and even did some balancing on one leg etc. I was able to flow from the various positions smoothly. I’m going to definitely consider that a perk from CrossFit. Headstands – I’m going to get you one of these days!
The instructor was so lovely. I really enjoyed her instruction. It was very light and positive. Sometimes I feel like some yogis are too into the whole yoga image that they make it almost forced. I had an instructor one time get frustrated because the class’s breathing was not “cleansing” enough. She sounded like a fire breathing dragon and I found nothing cleansing about her constant comments that we really needed to make an audible cleansing breath. Luckily – none of that with this class. 🙂 Yoga – I’ve missed you and hope to see you more often.
I got a FitBit Alta.
So I lost my Jawbone Up2. 🙁 And I honestly have no clue how. The clasp is very secure but I think I was adjusting it while we were walking through the mall and it somehow fell off. I didn’t realize it until I went to take it off to get ready for bed. I debated on getting a replacement fitness tracker. Because honestly I had only been mostly using it for sleep tracking. Some days I wouldn’t even get close to 5000 steps. Strangely enough – knowing I didn’t have a tracker on me, I became even more apathetic about walking. I know…I know…damned if I do and damned if I don’t. I really liked Jawbone’s app. But I wasn’t crazy about the Jawbone UP2 I had and the reviews for the UP3 weren’t that great either. The FitBit Alta is the newest model from FitBit and I really liked the look and features of it. I’ve only had it for a couple of days so I’m not going to a full review of it yet. Here’s hoping it’ll help me with getting me moving again.
Shopping – I’ve gone shopping a couple of times. Not nearly the same capacity like I would in the past, but still I didn’t quite stick with my new shopping guidelines. Sephora just had their VIB sale. Man I had that online shopping cart filled up! Like to the point the 15% discount really wasn’t going to offset the amount I was about to spend. But I decided to sleep on it before clicking the submit button. The next day I login and remove some items, add a couple of others…and just kept going back and forth with the items I had selected. I decided to wait one more day. The next morning I had an email from Sephora with the subject line “You need this…” *Lightning bolt moment* Marketing…the perpetual message around us that we need more and more stuff. It disgusted me. Don’t tell me WHAT I NEED. I deleted everything from my shopping cart. Have you guys ever felt that way? Like tired of having stuffed pushed at you from every which way?
There seems to be something going on…or in my case lack of going on. I’m not sure what sign/planet or whatever is in the horizon of another. I’m not sure if the year of the monkey has anything to do with it. Maybe global warming? Too many wireless signals? There seems to be this funk/rut going on for a lot of people. I guess it’s good to know I’m not alone. But I hope it’s not like when women’s cycles try to sync up.
Since I can’t seem to get my groove going, I decided to try to get to the root of the problem by going old school. Like hundreds of thousands of years old school. I’ve been seeing an acupuncturist. Who else are you going to call when you need your energy flow fixed? Not Ghostbusters (totally unrelated but I’m really looking forward to the new one).
After an assessment she concluded my qi and blood were stagnate.
to stop developing, progressing, moving, etc
to be or become inactive or still
cease developing; become inactive or dull
Yes – Yes I do feel like those descriptions. For months this feeling, all the attempts to get a jump start and going, and failing can all stem back to this word. I had become stagnate. But why…?
This afternoon I decided to take a quick walk break at work. I exit the building and the weather is gorgeous. A butterfly passes me by on my walk and I instantly think of my Dad. It was during the spring two years ago that my Dad was dying from cancer. I remember feeling like the world, as I knew it, was slowing down. Here we were starting a new year, the earth was awakening from winter, and I was watching my Dad slip away. My family was
disappearing as we all began to realize that he wasn’t going to improve. His condition was incurable. During the first half of 2014, I felt so frustrated and angry at my Dad. I often felt like he wasn’t trying. I now know and can clearly see that my Dad did the best he could. No one would want to spend his or her last months and days the way my Dad did.
That’s the thing with grief related to the loss of a loved one, it never leaves you. It leaves a void in your life. Grief randomly will affect you. Last year, during this time of year, I didn’t feel like I was in a rut. But I believe that was because I was so grateful to be in a much better place than 2014. Thank God for counseling! I was so thankful for no longer feeling constant sadness. I guess this year…my grief was triggered by the memories of a beautiful day.
Yep…I’m stagnate. I’m not progressing.
But now I’m able to identify why. And I’m going to take a cue from my counseling days and be kind and patient with myself.